ForeclosuresMass - ForeclosuresMass Monthly - Success Strategies - Three Tips for Updating Your Financial Myths (May 2007)

Remember that 1980s song, "Sisters are doing it for themselves," by Aretha Franklin? Women are definitely doing it for themselves these days - and one thing they're doing is purchasing real estate in record numbers.

According to research by the National Association of Realtors, single women represented a record 22% of all first-time homebuyers in 2006, up from 14% in 1995. This group of buyers is second behind married couples and well ahead of single men - who account for only 9% of all homebuyers.

Getting closer to home, 60% of homes purchased in Massachusetts in 2006 were bought by married couples, 8% by unmarried couples, 6% by single men, and a whopping 24% by single women!

This increase in women homebuyers is a huge change from 25 years ago when the number of single male and female homebuyers was roughly equal.

* Next 37 17 investors only!

These numbers are significant, too, given the cultural mindset many baby boomer women grew up with. Financial investing and home buying were activities you left for after you got married.

And, despite the amended Fair Housing Act of 1974 - which stipulated that women could have credit in their own names and indeed, purchase properties without having a husband or father co-sign - it's still a pervasive "myth" in our culture that a woman can't or shouldn't buy a house on her own.

In fact, I see 20-something women in my practice who tell me their parents tell them they're making a big mistake if they buy a house before getting married!

If you're a woman and have been considering real estate investing because you want to increase your financial security, build wealth, or provide for your family - or all three! - but can't seem to get off the couch so to speak, it may be you're carrying around some of this emotional baggage without realizing it.

It's a fact that old money myths can keep you from achieving your goals. What follows are three strategies for updating your ideas about becoming financially independent.

All of us - male and female - hold a set of unexamined beliefs and messages about money that come from our families. These beliefs become a "compressed file" when you keep your money concerns bottled up inside.

A good way to gently open this file and begin examining these beliefs is by reading books, such as Women and Money by Suze Orman or Money, A Memoir: Women, Emotions and Cash by Liz Perle.

I recommend these books because they aren't financial "how-to" books on investing, which can be overwhelming if you're not ready for this step. Instead, these books allow you to begin questioning long-held beliefs: i.e.: "Money is too complicated," "I don't need more money," "It's better to help others than to make more money," or even, "Money is dirty" (!).

You can either write your thoughts in a journal or start a money group with like-minded women and share your beliefs and ideas. List your beliefs one by one, and then look at each belief objectively. Is it true? What can you do to change how you react to that belief?

Did you know that study after study has shown female stock market investors outperform their male counterparts?

Yes, it's true. In a 2001 study, for example, Terrance Odean and Brad Barber proved that men trade 45% more than women but earned "annual risk-adjusted net returns that were 1.4% less than those of women."

They go on to add that "these differences were more pronounced between single men and single women; single men trade 67% more than single women but earned annual risk-adjusted net returns 2.3% less than those earned by single women."

What does this mean? Men, according to Odean, are overconfident when it comes to finances and investing. Overconfidence leads them to trade more often than women, and to take greater risks, both of which lead to lower returns.

What this study - and others like it - says to me is that women investors actually do quite well, despite the fact that women will tell you money is "complicated" or that they leave financial matters to their husbands who "understand this stuff" better than they do.

Having an updated "database" of statistics and trends like this study, or the growing number of women homeowners cited above, gives women permission to reexamine the embedded beliefs and thoughts they didn't know were constraining them.

Instead of thinking, "I can't invest in real estate - I won't do well" a woman can now think, "Wow, other women are investing in real estate successfully. If they can do it, I can, too."

This type of "inner" work can take some time. You don't flip a switch and instantly have a new relationship with money. I like to tell my clients that the process is more like a dimmer switch - as you slowly turn the switch, the dark room becomes lighter until finally the entire room is illuminated.

Sometimes it's helpful to literally write the old belief - "I'll never make enough money," - in order to neutralize the negativity. Then, generalize the belief so you create a reasonable rule, which you can state in the third person if you aren't ready to buy it for yourself yet. For example, in this case the negative belief is changed to, "It's okay to make enough money," and when that feels comfortable, you personalize it by changing it to, "It's okay for me to me to make enough money."

Do this with each belief and soon you will have turned your limiting beliefs into expansive affirmations, which give you the power to change your outlook and your life.

At times you'll feel like you're literally battling self-doubts and inner demons in order to make positive changes. Use your group or journal to record what you're thinking . . . and go forward with your game plan.

When you change your beliefs about money, however, money actually changes your life. You deserve peace of mind and prosperity.

Szifra Birke is a licensed psychotherapist who works with people around money, emotions, and values. She's also a financial behavioral specialist and works with financial planners and wealth investment professionals. She can be reached by telephone at 978-446-9600 or via her website at http://www.birkeconsulting.com.